Birthdays

Your birthday, the anniversary of your birth, 25 years old, a quarter of a century, half way to 50...

No matter which way you look at it, you're celebrating life. And that, we did today :)

Jason turned 25! Lower car insurance (although I'm not sure when he'll even be driving again), and that's about all I can think of for 25. They get less and less fun the higher they go. I'm sure he never pictured this for his birthday celebration. I'm sure he never thought he would be in this situation in his life. Who would. I never thought I would be, either.

From some of the brief research I did moments after I found out about his injuries, I found that families in situations like mine celebrate 'alive days'. The anniversary of the day of the incident every year, to be the 'alive day' - if we decide to do that, August will be a busy month of celebrating life!

He enjoyed all the cards he got from various friends and family back home (both VA and Colorado), although it was kind of like a sick joke to have to open a card with one working hand :) They're all currently hanging in his room (which I'm sure violates some sort of fire code, but whatever).

Today was a much better day mobility wise as well - they took his epidural out, so he had a ton more movement in his legs. He transferred himself practically from bed to wheelchair and wheelchair to toilet and then back again. He gets frustrated now though, sitting and having his legs dangling, and being able to put one on the ground, but not the other. Totally throws off his balance. He's also caught himself multiple times tonight trying to cross his right leg over his left while lying in bed...and that doesn't work, or even just bending his knee up and resting on his foot...which isn't there. So I'm sure when he has the prosthesis this will be much easier, but never the same.

We seem to be much closer emotionally, talking about things in normal conversation that others might never say to their spouse. I've always been one to put it all out there, usually too much, and it usually gets me in trouble. But I've never been able to keep my feelings to myself, especially to him. Some may disagree with that, saying he doesn't need the added stress, but he's my husband, and best friend, and the only one who would understand, even a little bit, how I'm feeling in this situation, because he's going through it too. And we're in this together. We've always been able to communicate - it just hasn't always been in a productive way. We're working on that :) It's pretty hard to argue now though, with the circumstances. But we're not in the daily grind anymore, either. It is refreshing that we're getting along so well through all of this. Not that we argued terribly before, but we were definitely having a harder time understanding and empathizing with each others perspective during that first year of marriage. It's just nice that, despite the circumstances, I can show up there every day and we get along. I can almost feel us growing closer through it all while it's happening, instead of pulling us apart. This will be a bond we will have that very few others will, and it will be that much harder to break.

Sadie seems to be adjusting well to her new home in Virginia. Daddy even called home today to check and make sure the neighbors let her out. He didn't want to leave her. ha! This dog has given him a new purpose in life I think :) But as much as she drove me crazy being right under my feet all the time, I miss that dog. I know Jason misses her more. She was his great idea! But we couldn't have gotten more lucky with a rescue dog. She is absolutely wonderful, and beautiful. I'm sad that we will be apart from her for so long, and I worry about the transition with the baby/toddler depending on when it is. I hope she doesn't forget we are her original owners, and she will eventually be coming back to live with us one day, we just don't know when.

My favorite part of the day is night time, when everyone leaves for the day and it's just him and I. I feel like I might've said this before. Either way, it's just nice. We can reflect on the day, catch up on our Words with Friends games, do our stretches, and think about what we want to do tomorrow. Maybe we'll venture downstairs tomorrow for the first time! And if they tell me no, you know I'll probably take him anyway :) I make sure he's got a full cup of water for the night, and his phone and call bell are near. We pseudo hug and 'snuggle' as much as possible, and then I wait for his Seroquel to kick in, and I leave for the night. I still hate leaving him, but it is getting easier, especially as he gets stronger. And he's getting stronger by the day, for sure.